Why Do People Cheat in Relationships?

I often get asked on why a partner cheated or what you need to do when your partner cheats.

You may not have anything to do with your partner cheating on you. However, you may contribute to triggers that result in your partner embarking on the cheating path.

I strongly believe the first step to understanding cheating is to understand the cheater’s mindset and where he/she is operating from.

Cheaters have buried and unhealed emotional trauma and are seeking for answers to resolve their internalized and unprocessed emotions.

Cheaters are triggered by words that bring them back into a place of buried emotional wounds/trauma.

Whenever this happens, cheaters shift to find someone new and continue to repeat the unhealthy patterns without finding a solution or gaining a conscious awareness of the root cause of their issues.

People who attract cheaters and settle on the other hand, have buried emotional trauma/wounds they are not consciously aware of.

Cheaters bring such partners a conscious awareness of something they (the partners) need to heal from.

Bond formed with the cheater is a trauma bond in the quest for a partner who will rescue you.

The goal is to gain a conscious awareness and work on yourself (not focusing on the cheater) and learn the lessons in order not to repeat patterns going forward.

Ask yourself the following questions:

What did you learn about yourself in the relationship?
What did you learn about your emotional and mental state of mind?
What are your takeaways from the relationship about where you are with yourself?
How will you apply the lessons to your life and journey going forward?

"Watch your habits, they become patterns. Watch your patterns, they become repetition without learning the lessons. Watch out for repetition, it becomes a lifestyle without utilizing the lessons learned." - excerpt, "Beyond the Pain." Copyright ©2014, Kemi Sogunle. All Rights Reserved.

Ready to begin your healing journey? Schedule a complimentary session with me or learn more about coaching programs I offer.