5 Dating Tips for the Divorced

Dating after divorce can sometimes be challenging. You have been married and out of the dating league for a while and now you have to learn how to start the conversation while trying to figure out how to blend in without feeling rustic. Here are five tips to help you get back into the dating world:

Always be yourself. You may want to impress your date but without being yourself, you may end up messing things up. Take a cue from your date and be a good listener. Do not be too quick to talk about yourself but learn to listen to all your date is willing to share. The more you listen in, the more you will discover. This also lets you know if a second date is worth it.
Do not talk about your ex. It is easy to start answering questions about your ex on your first date but try to avoid going there with the conversation. Redirect your date to centering his/her questions around both of you. You do not want to start bashing your ex which may end up turning your date off.
Be open and honest. Be transparent about what you are looking for in a relationship if asked.
"Dating is a vetting and sorting game that will allow you know if you are ready to discover and explore the other party." - Kemi SogunleMake your requirements known and watch your date's reaction and body language when you do.
Do not set expectations. Do not expect anything but prepare yourself for friendship. Do not listen to the words alone. Remember, it is an initial getting to know you date...not a romantic or exclusive relationship. You are both still exploring the friendship and learning about each other. Always remember this: "Unrealistic expectations lead to disappointments and disappointments are life's teacher." - Kemi Sogunle
Ask Questions. Do not be afraid to ask as many questions that will help you make a decision if it is worth going on a second date and beyond. Do not make plans for the future at this point. It is way too early to start making plans but ask about your date's goals to ensure they align with yours (this will serve as a decision making point).

Do not forget to thank your date and make eye contact. Limit your discussion about your previous marriage and do not make comparison when exchanging information on previous marriages. Always remember, every date will be unique just as every relationship is.

Dating is all about exploration. You explore to vet and sort the partner and ensure him/her share the same goals. You want to be sure you are not being dragged into lust and infatuation. At the end of the day, you should be able to tell if you will likely go on a second date or call it quit.

Learn more about the Purposeful Relationship Mastery Program for Singles/Divorced.

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