5 Signs Your Partner Suffers from Low Self-Esteem

A partner suffering from low self-esteem will make your relationship feel one-sided but knowing the signs to watch out for can save you a lot of time.

1. Your partner is very controlling
   A partner with low self-esteem often appear as extremely controlling and may exhibit abusive behaviors. This may lead you to losing your own confidence and self-esteem, if you are not careful enough. Tolerating such behavior may result in you settling and later regretting making such decisions in the future.
2. Your partner constantly puts you down
   The use of negative words are common indicators of a partner with low self-esteem. Making you feel that you are not good enough while not showing up for you, loving you the way you deserve to be loved and holding on to fear due to his/her emotional fences (either from childhood pain, breakup or rejection) is an attribute exhibited by such a partner. The moment you feel you cannot take it anymore, such a partner, will make you hold on by manipulating you to stay with them.
3. Your partner is too focused on self
   A partner with low self-esteem focuses on themselves than both of you in a relationship. They talk more about their needs and how you need to be there for them but never consider or meet your own needs. Staying with such a partner will suck up your self-esteem and drain you of your confidence. You will eventually lose your worth.
4. Your partner is always looking for attention
   A partner with low self-esteem cannot stand you becoming successful or appreciated for getting so much attention due to anger and resentment. Your success is a turn off to them and due to their craving for attention, such partner will try to discourage you from doing anything positive. They believe you have to depend completely on them to succeed. This is part of their attention-seeking scheme and is exhibited when your success becomes a threat to them.
5. Your partner may be overly sexually demanding
   Sex is used as a consolation as a soother for a partner suffering from low self-esteem. Your partner may bully you or put pressure on you to have sex. This is often a weapon used by players who suffer from low self-esteem to attract the easy-to-get partner.

Be very mindful of a partner with low self-esteem. They are quick to make friends but people tend to see their true colors after a short period of friendship. They cannot keep true friends who tell them the truth but look for those with low self-esteem that they can take advantage of. They are often intimidated by people with high self-worth who can easily read through them. They are also talkers, appear to be overly confident (but are not) and they can sell you anything which means nothing on the long run.

Do not spend time trying to understand or love them, they will only deplete you and make you feel less than you are worth. Know what you need long-term and learn to wait for the right partner you deserve and who truly deserves to be with you.

What's next:
Support your partner by helping him/her get help. Learn how you can help your partner boost his/her self-esteem.  Learn about Relationship Coaching with me.

This material is copyrighted and the intellectual property of Kemi Sogunle. ©2014 Kemi Sogunle. All Rights Reserved.

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