Are You in a Relationship for Commitment or Convenience?

Having a relationship is great but knowing if you are in for convenience or commitment reasons is greater. You may be ready for a committed relationship but may not be able to recognize if it is a convenient one than what you desire. Here are a few tips to help you know if you are in for convenience or commitment:

If you are in a convenient relationship you are more emotionally dependent on your partner and less emotionally stable. All your actions are based on your partner’s decisions for your relationship and you rely heavily on them. You believe your world is incomplete without them and your partner’s intentions are not known to you. You make assumptions that further lead you to have frequent emotional roller coasters, anxiety and worry. Committed relationship on the other hand allows you to be emotionally stable. Both partners recognize their roles in the relationship and decisions are made in agreement as a couple (it is not one sided). Your emotions do not lead you to panicking or instability as your partner’s intentions are known to you.
Convenient relationships are based out of selfish gains. You are looking to get in, for what you can get and not what you can give. This type of relationship is based on sexual or financial gains and does not last for long. You may think of it as selfish because your focus in on what is in it for you and you cannot see beyond what you are hoping to get. However, it is an unhealthy habit created based on your limited beliefs as well as illusions. In a committed relationship, you would not have to worry about your partner being selfish. Both of you are dedicated to being selfless and to one another. Your loyalty, honesty, trust and love for each other stand strong and unshakable. Your goals, visions and values are aligned.
Your requirements are met before you commit to each other in a committed relationship. You know you are not settling but have found the love of your life. Convenient relationships however, do not meet your requirements but lead you to settle and believe you can make your partner meet those requirements later on in your relationship. Your relationship lacks vision when it is for convenience and has no purpose to fulfill since you are both in for the benefits not to accomplish your goals.
You do not complement each other when it is for convenience reasons but put up with each other to obtain the benefits whether sexual or financial and you will not be comfortable most of the time. However, in a committed relationship, you complement each other because your visions/goals/needs are aligned and you are spiritually connected to one another. Committed relationship does not bring discomfort of any sort but makes you comfortable in your own skin.

Convenience relationships evolve out of infatuation, lust and selfishness while committed relationships emerge from selflessness, love, dedication, honesty and loyalty to mention a few. Ensure you know what you are heading into if you plan on having a committed relationship so that you do not settle for convenience. Love is not about convenience but commitment.

What's Next? Schedule a coaching session with me to help you get started on a journey to having a committed relationship.

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