# Kemi Sogunle - Certified Life and Relationship Coach

> Love, Life, Relationship, Purpose™


## Posts

- [Understanding Relationship Failures and Strategies for Improvement](https://kemisogunle.com/2025/08/why-relationships-fails-and-how-to-improve-them/): Common Reasons Why Relationships Fail The dynamics of relationships can be intricate, and various factors often contribute to their breakdown. One prominent reason is poor communication, which frequently leads to misunderstandings and emotional disconnection between partners. When individuals do not express their feelings or needs clearly, resentment can build. Research indicates that couples who communicate openly are significantly more likely to maintain long-lasting relationships. For example, misunderstandings regarding finances or household responsibilities often stem from inadequate communication, ultimately leading to conflict. Another critical factor is lack of intimacy. Intimacy, both emotional and physical, creates a strong bond between partners. When […]
- [How to Resolve Conflicts in a Relationship](https://kemisogunle.com/2025/03/how-to-resolve-conflicts-in-a-relationship/): Are you in a toxic relationship or do you struggle with resolving conflicts in your relationship? If you are looking to be in a healthy relationship or find yourself in an unhealthy relationship and are questioning how to make to resolve your issues, here are 5 things to consider: Acknowledge that both parties recognize the toxicity in the relationship. Ability to face this truth is the first step to breaking down the root causes of the toxicity.   Commit to finding ways through professional support to heal and do the work needed to get to a healthy place as individuals […]
- [How to Heal From a Heartbreak](https://kemisogunle.com/2024/03/how-to-heal-from-a-heartbreak/): Heartbreaks are hard to swallow and can take a toll on you when it happens. Imagine having been with someone you love and suddenly, everything becomes overwhelming when the relationship ends. Heartbreaks don’t only come from relationships. They also happen when we experience emotional trauma. You will ask yourself the question, “Where do I begin?” so many times and sometimes, you won’t feel like getting out of your bed. Heartbreaks are conscious awakening moments that allow us to realize that we are losing ourselves. If we do not understand this, we end up shutting down and suffering silently. Heartbreaks require […]
- [](https://kemisogunle.com/2024/01/how-to-find-your-greatness/): Welcome to 2024. There are twelve chapters of life in this year…to write, read, explore and discover your true self. What you choose to do in and with each chapter, can significantly affect the trajectory of your life. Today, I share nuggets of wisdom with you as you explore the thirty one days of chapter one of 2024. Always remember: “No one can make you great until you realize that there is greatness in you.” – Kemi Sogunle Schedule a complimentary session with me. Get My Books Beyond the Pain Being Single: A State for the Fragile Heart Love, Sex, […]
- [Relationship and Confirmation Biases](https://kemisogunle.com/2023/08/relationship-and-confirmation-biases/): Relationship and confirmation biases are birthed from limited beliefs created out of buried/unhealed emotional pain/trauma. These biases hold you up in bondage and result in you self-sabotaging. I share nuggets with you on this topic to help you understand why eliminating these biases will liberate you and help you discover your true self. Always remember that nothing can hold you captive for long except you choose captivity as your only option. Schedule a complimentary session with me to learn how you can stop self-sabotaging. Get My Books            
- [How Expectations, Entitlement and Emotional Pain/Trauma Affect Our Lives](https://kemisogunle.com/2023/05/how-expectations-entitlement-and-emotional-pain-trauma-affect-our-lives/): Expectations bring us a lot of emotional pain/trauma but without gaining a conscious awareness as to how they affect us, we tend to feel entitled to certain things and end up becoming disappointed while also acquiring emotional pain/trauma. On today’s episode of “Love, Sex, Lies and Reality” Talks, which happens to be the last episode before the Summer, I share nuggets that can help you gain a conscious awakening and lead you to shift towards healing and becoming the best version of yourself while still breathing and living. By the way, don’t forget to get the books I mentioned on […]
- [Your Heart is Not Broken!](https://kemisogunle.com/2023/05/your-heart-is-not-broken/): Have you ever had your heart broken by the person you thought would be the best partner for you? So many times, we believe that our hearts have been broken but the reality is that our hearts are never broken. No one can truly break your heart without you giving it away. This results in losing yourself than finding yourself. On today’s episode of “Love, Sex, Lies and Reality” Talks, I share nuggets on understanding why your heart can never be truly broken. Listen in and share your thoughts/feedback with me. Ready to explore how to heal your heart after […]
- [Why You May Be Struggling to Find a Partner](https://kemisogunle.com/2023/04/why-you-may-be-struggling-to-find-a-partner/): Have you found yourself getting exciting about dates but not able to connect with the potential partner beyond a few dates? Reality is that “#Dating is a vetting and sorting game and you have to be able to vet and sort potential partners based on your core values and relationship goals. On today’s episode of “Love, Sex, Lies and Reality” Talks, I #share 2 nuggets that can #help you learn and put an end to the struggles you may face with finding a partner and having a healthy lifetime relationship. You have to understand that finding the right partner is […]
- [The Romance Myth](https://kemisogunle.com/2023/04/the-romance-myth/): Why do we focus so much on romantic relationship? How does romance define the relationship? On today’s episode of “Love, Sex, Lies and Reality” Talks, I share my realistic viewpoint on romance in a relationship. I strongly believe as a coach, that most couples miss out on building a solid foundation for their relationships when they focus on romance first. Building a solid foundation for your relationship is vital to getting to know your partner and growing together in love. Ready to learn more on how to establish a solid foundation for your relationship and build healthy together? Schedule a […]
- [How to Connect with Your Feelings](https://kemisogunle.com/2023/02/how-to-connect-with-your-feelings/): Whenever we experience feelings and are emotions are awakened, we tend to run to others to validate the feelings. Reality is that no one can feel what you feel because the feelings are unique to you and the are bringing you a conscious awareness about your life. Before you run to someone else about your feelings, I challenge you to do these three things… “No one can feel what you feel, when you feel it, why you feel it, how you feel it and what the feeling is teaching you about yourself but you.” – Kemi Sogunle Read to explore […]
- [Understanding Why We Struggle in Life's Journey](https://kemisogunle.com/2023/02/understanding-why-we-struggle-in-lifes-journey/): Understanding the root causes of why we struggle in life’s journey is key to discovering and tapping into our inner strengths. Struggling is a test we all have to face in life’s journey in order to thrive and evolve. Today, I share how to understand your struggles and turn them into positive outcomes that will #help you evolve and #discover your inner strength. “Every #struggle is a source of life’s tests. The tests we face in life’s journey are not to reveal our weaknesses but to help us discover our inner strengths. We can only know how strong we are […]
- [How to Begin the Self-Discovery Journey](https://kemisogunle.com/2023/01/how-to-begin-the-self-discovery-journey/): As we start the brand-new year, don’t leave yourself behind. Take charge of your life and journey. Become accountable and responsible for the life God gave to you. Discover the parts of you that you need to connect to and with. Make good use of your time in life. Always remember that you are a light. No one can dim your light except you give them the power to do so. Reconnect with your light and make it shine through healing, forgiveness and self-discovery. Be a light to others along the way than a source of darkness. “Live life while […]
- [Are You Truly Ready for the Relationship?](https://kemisogunle.com/2022/12/are-you-truly-ready-for-the-relationship/): So many of us desire a relationship or marriage but this requires a lot of work in our individual lives as well as with the relationship. A healthy marriage or relationship requires 100% from each partner. However, if only one person is doing the work, it’s not going to be a healthy relationship. Love requires work and it begins with working on yourself first. I share more on today’s episode of “Love, Sex, Lies and Reality” Talks. “Every relationship you have, is a reflection of the relationship with yourself.” – Kemi Sogunle Ready to learn how to establish a healthy […]
- [Understanding the Power of Forgiveness](https://kemisogunle.com/2022/11/understanding-the-power-of-forgiveness/): The Power of Forgiveness lies in knowing, understanding and loving yourself. Oftentimes, when we harbor unforgiveness, we do ourselves more harm and bask in an atmosphere of pain/trauma. Forgiveness is part of healing and learning to love yourself in order to have the love you will share with others. Forgiveness in liberating. I share in this video series on why it is important to forgive yourself and others. Watch Part 2 of The Power of Forgiveness Ready to make a shift? Schedule a complimentary session with me. Get My Books                 #lovesexliesandreality #dating […]
- [Right vs. Wrong Relationship - Let's Talk About It!](https://kemisogunle.com/2022/10/right-vs-wrong-relationship-lets-talk-about-it/): Is there truly such a thing as a right or wrong relationship? Have you found yourself attracting who you call the right vs. wrong partners? Today I shed some light into this topic to help others understand right vs. wrong when it comes to dating, attraction and finding love. Watch this to discover more… Get My Books                 #lovesexliesandreality #dating #kemisogunle #beingsingle #beyondthepain #onbecomingrestored #iamkemisogunle #consciouslove #purposefulrelationship #selfhealing #relationship
- [There is Greatness in You!](https://kemisogunle.com/2022/09/there-is-greatness-in-you/): There is greatness in you irrespective of what you may be going through. The fact that you are still here breathing and alive is evidence that you need to tap into the opportunities awaiting you. Understand that yesterday is history and cannot be repeated. Today…this very moment is the only option you have to make a change to change your life…Take a leap of faith and step into your greatness. Remember this: “If you don’t discover your greatness, you won’t be able to manifest it or fulfill it.” – Kemi Sogunle Strive harder and be focused. Your best is yet […]
- [Overcoming the Storms of Life - How to Navigate Life's Challenges](https://kemisogunle.com/2022/09/overcoming-the-storms-of-life-how-to-navigate-lifes-challenges/): “The tests we face in life’s journey are not to reveal our weaknesses but to help us discover our inner strengths. We can only know how strong we are when we strive and thrive beyond the challenges we face.” – Kemi Sogunle, excerpt, “Beyond the Pain.” Copyright © 2014. All Rights Reserved. Schedule a complimentary session with me to get started. Get My Books         #lovesexliesandreality #beingsingle #beyondthepain #onbecomingrestored #iamkemisogunle #kemisogunle #overcomingchallenges #selfmastery
- [How to Make Your Relationship Last Forever](https://kemisogunle.com/2022/08/how-to-make-your-relationship-last-forever/): We all want to have a great relationship, but it requires time and effort from both partners. I share tips on how to build the solid foundation for a great relationship that will last a lifetime in this video. Always remember: “If you are not committed to yourself, you cannot commit to anyone else.” – excerpt, “On Becoming Restored.” Copyright © 2014, Kemi Sogunle. All Rights Reserved. Watch this video as I answer the question and provide tips that can help you work on your marriage/relationship. Schedule a complimentary session with me to get started with building a healthy and purpose […]
- [Why Marriages and Relationships Fail](https://kemisogunle.com/2022/07/why-marriages-and-relationships-fail/): So many relationships and marriages are failing due to mirroring the previous generations (while repeating patterns), birthing of fantasies and illusions of what a marriage or relationship should be based on movies and listening to third parties who cannot help you and your partner create the uniqueness of your marriage/relationship. Watch this video as I answer the question and provide tips that can help you work on your marriage/relationship. Schedule a complimentary session with me to get started with building a healthy relationship foundation. Get My Books                 #lovesexliesandreality #beingsingle #beyondthepain #onbecomingrestored #iamkemisogunle #kemisogunle […]
- [Being Single vs. Being in a Relationship](https://kemisogunle.com/2022/07/being-single-vs-being-in-a-relationship/): I was asked a question: “Should I stay single, or should I get into a relationship?” This is a great question to ask yourself prior to jumping into a relationship especially if you are on a self-discovery journey. Being in a relationship doesn’t always solve underlying emotional pain/trauma. It may create additional emotional pain/trauma which will make you lose yourself further. Watch this video as I answer the question and provide tips that can help you move forward in life’s journey. Schedule a complimentary session with me to get started with self-mastery. Get My Books             […]
- [Why Mistreating Others Reveal Unhealed Parts of Ourselves](https://kemisogunle.com/2022/06/why-mistreating-others-reveal-unhealed-parts-of-ourselves/): We sometimes, get in our own ways when we lack an understanding of our emotions and feelings. This is why we find ourselves struggling internally and the internal conflict we experience, cause of to shift blame on others who may bring us a conscious awareness of areas we need to work on or heal from. We self-sabotage and deny ourselves of truthful living when we lack understanding of our emotions and feelings. We turn them into buried layers of pain/trauma that rob us of our blessings and growth opportunities in life. The goal is to choose healing in order to […]
- [The Power of Your Voice](https://kemisogunle.com/2022/04/the-power-of-your-voice/): So many times, in life’s journey, we lose our voices to others, cultural, traditional and societal norms. We continue to recycle the same generational patterns and trauma without gaining the conscious awareness of who we truly are created to be and become. Finding your voice is part of finding yourself…the journey of self-discovery and healing. It requires courage and commitment daily. It is learning to choose you, know you, love you so that you can give yourself all they love you need and allow your cup to be full. This will allow you to recognize how to love others by […]
- [Transactional Relationship vs. Conscious/True Love](https://kemisogunle.com/2022/04/transactional-relationship-vs-conscious-true-love/): We have been conditioned to believe that transactional relationships are what we need to find love. This has created emotional and generational trauma for so many of us and has resulted in many unhealthy relationships. This is the entryway to failed relationships when we do not take the time to realize that transactions do not last forever. Reality is that we end up repeating habits and patterns while learning to hold on to unhealthy coping mechanisms that we adopt and adapt to along the way. The repeated habits and patterns alter our behaviors and result in unhealthy lifestyles. Without embarking […]
- [10 Ways to Get Over a Toxic Relationship](https://kemisogunle.com/2022/02/10-ways-to-get-over-a-toxic-relationship/): Going through a toxic relationship can take a toll on you. However, you must work on getting over such a relationship and understand that you are embarking on a journey to becoming better in your life’s journey. Here are 10 Ways to Get Over a Toxic Relationship: Take time to grieve. Accept what was and choose to accept what is while letting go of what is gone. You cannot change the past, but you must focus on the present moment you have. Focus on the lessons. What did you learn about yourself? What did you learn about your life and […]
- [5 Lessons You Can Learn from the Tinder Swindler](https://kemisogunle.com/2022/02/5-lessons-you-can-learn-from-the-tinder-swindler/): Watching the Tinder Swindler reveals that so many women believe in finding a rescuer to give them love. So many of us women want to be swept off our feet by Prince Charming. However, without learning to love ourselves, we will end up giving ourselves away in relationships that will teach us to come back home to ourselves. I have been there in the past myself before I embarked on the healing journey. The reasons we seek for love outside of ourselves is due to lack of self-love. Here are 5 lessons you can learn from the Tinder Swindler: Love […]
- [Why Do People Cheat in Relationships?](https://kemisogunle.com/2022/02/why-do-people-cheat-in-relationships/): I often get asked on why a partner cheated or what you need to do when your partner cheats. You may not have anything to do with your partner cheating on you.  However, you may contribute to triggers that result in your partner embarking on the cheating path. I strongly believe the first step to understanding cheating is to understand the cheater’s mindset and where he/she is operating from. Cheaters have buried and unhealed emotional trauma and are seeking for answers to resolve their internalized and unprocessed emotions. Cheaters are triggered by words that bring them back into a place […]
- [How to Let Go When a Relationship is Over](https://kemisogunle.com/2022/01/how-to-let-go-when-a-relationship-is-over/): The reason why we find it hard to accept the fact that it is the end of a relationship or may struggle to let go of certain situations. This is mainly due to buried and unhealed emotional wounds that we are yet to heal from. To be able to accept that a relationship is over, requires gaining a deep understand that it was a phase in your journey and there were lessons for you to learn. This happens because you need to evolve and discover your true self. You must understand that life is not meant to be stagnant but […]
- [Are You Ready for the New Year?](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/12/are-you-ready-for-the-new-year/): The year 2021 has come to an end. It may have been a year of roller coaster for some and a year of enlightenment for others. No matter what 2021 brought to us, we must continue to learn about who we truly are created to be and our purpose in life without giving up on ourselves. What have you learnt about yourself this year? What knowledge and wisdom did you gain about yourself? Did you learn to become more resilient in order to discover your inner strengths or did you give up on yourself? We have limitless opportunities to change our […]
- [How Unhealed Childhood Trauma Affects Relationships](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/12/how-unhealed-childhood-trauma-affects-relationships/): Childhood trauma can significantly affect a relationship whether it be romantic or mutual. It can also contribute to why you may find yourself in rebounds or repeated patterns when it comes to dating. Unhealed childhood trauma usually resurfaces in our adulthood in many forms. What we don’t heal from later comes to haunt us as an awakening that we need to heal. Unhealed childhood trauma shows up in adulthood/relationships in many ways: Projection – This can be in form of anger, disappointment, rage towards the partner. It can be intense based on fear and comes due to the struggle of […]
- [The Truth About Dating](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/10/the-truth-about-dating/): How well do you know what to do when it comes to dating? The truth is that some many people believe that dating is a relationship. Without knowing what you are looking for in a partner, the dating process may become confusing and be a phase where you get lost in your own world. “Dating is a vetting and sorting process. Dating is not a relationship. The relationship you have with yourself will set the pace for the friendship you will build upon while dating. Not everyone is meant to move on from the dating process…that’s okay.” – Kemi Sogunle […]
- [Why Your Emotional and Mental Health Matter](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/10/emotional-mental-health/): Have you found yourself struggling with understanding your emotions? Do you truly believe that your emotions and feelings are always valid? Taking care of your emotional and mental health should be of utmost priority to you as they are part of who you are. Without taking good care of your emotional and mental healthy, you may find yourself getting stuck in life, repeating unhealthy patterns or developing behavioral issues while your body is busy keeping scores. If you are struggling with your emotional and mental health and need support, schedule a complimentary session with me to learn how to improve […]
- [Singles and Getting Married: What You Should Know](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/10/marriage-vs-wedding/): Dear Singles, There is a huge difference between the wedding and a marriage. So many people want the wedding but are not ready for the marriage. If you do not know and understand yourself, the wedding will look attractive to you and you will desire it. However, you won’t be ready for the marriage as it will reveal that you don’t know what you need or know who you are. You will project your emotional trauma on your partner and you both will constantly have unresolved conflicts that will rip you apart. Marriage is not for the faint at heart. […]
- [Unforgiveness - The Silent Disease](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/09/unforgiveness-the-silent-disease/): Have you found yourself holding on to unforgiveness that it is silently destroying you? Have you been in a relationship or friendship where you have vouched not to forgive someone? Do you believe it is hard to forgive? “You cannot love if you cannot forgive.” Excerpt, “Beyond the Pain.” Copyright © 2014, Kemi Sogunle. All Rights Reserved. How is unforgiveness serving you? Why you do believe you should not forgive yourself and others? What will it cost you to forgive? Why don’t you want to forgive? Are you your own blessing blocker by refusing to forgive? “Without forgiveness and love, […]
- [How to Handle Your Parents' Divorce](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/08/how-to-handle-your-parents-divorce/): Watching your parents go through a divorce can be tough especially with mixed emotions. Allow yourself to feel whatever it is you are feeling and allow yourself to learn what those feelings are teach you about yourself. Oftentimes, we think our parents’ divorce is our responsibility. However, it is part of their own journey in life. The Lessons We Learn Through Our Parents’ Divorce Reality is whatever we learn from our parents’ journeys, should teach us about things we should not repeat in our own lives. • Allow their experience to teach you lessons about relationships. • Allow their experience […]
- [5 Reasons Why You Aren't Healing](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/08/5-reasons-why-you-are-not-healing/): Healing is a lifetime process but knowing where to begin can sometimes be challenging. Here are 5 Reason You Aren’t Healing or Choosing the Healing Process: Failing to take time to grieve. Grieving allows you to self-reflect. However, it usually begins with denial. Hence, why we sometimes run away from the healing process. We want to remain in denial that the situations never happened but we must face the situations in order to learn the lessons and emerge.Once you can accept what was and is, you will be able to move along the grieving process. Grieving also allows you to […]
- [Death to the Soul - Deep Conversation About Life and Healing](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/08/death-to-the-soul-deep-conversation-about-life-and-healing/): Are you dead or dying to your own soul without knowing? Are you living with emotional wounds that are breaking you further and leaving you lost in your own world? Today, I address how we become dead to our souls and the need to revive our soul in order to become consciously awakened and commit to truthful and purposeful living. Are you ready to take a leap and change your life for the better? Schedule a complimentary session with me to learn how. Get My Books               #deathtothesoul #lovesexliesandreality #beingsingle #beyondthepain #onbecomingrestored #kemisogunle #purposefulrelationship […]
- [How to Gain a Conscious Awareness of Who You Are](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/07/how-to-gain-a-conscious-awareness-of-who-you-are/): Everything you are fighting with, is self-created from overly processed thoughts from past experiences and limited beliefs created from those experiences. You must develop the conscious awareness of what life is teaching you about yourself so that you can discover yourself and grow to a higher level while exploring life. Internal battles are created due to lack of conscious awakening to your true self. You must learn to surrender yourself to learn as you go and grow through the process of life. Realize that you are on a journey of knowing and understanding the light and love that God created […]
- [10 Reasons Why Couples Take to Divorce](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/07/10-reasons-why-couples-take-to-divorce/): Divorce isn’t an easy decision as many people think and there are underlying conditions that the couple may not be consciously aware of before getting a divorce. Here are 10 reasons why couples head into a divorce: 1. Buried/Unhealed childhood emotional trauma. 2. Lack of self-awareness (not knowing who you are as an individual before getting into a relationship). 3. Coping mechanisms which later become overwhelming and no longer bearable. 4. Comparison of relationship/marriage with others while forgetting that every marriage is unique. 5. Repeating generational patterns and cycles they mirrored in caregivers/parental/family marriages or relationships. 6. Societal illusions that […]
- [Can You Truly Love Someone and Choose to Say Goodbye?](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/06/can-you-truly-love-someone-and-choose-to-say-goodbye/): I have been asked this question so many times in the past two months and I wanted to share my views on loving someone and saying goodbye. Read my views below: You cannot truly love someone and walk away when you are both operating in a healthy space. The question is: “Was it really love or was it codependency/transactional love?” I believe a lot of people confuse what true love is with transactional love. Hence, why we find ourselves in unhealthy relationships due to lack of self-love and self-abandonment. If you truly love someone, you will never leave them. True […]
- [12 Things a Couple Must Do to Sustain Their Relationship](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/06/12-things-a-couple-must-do-to-sustain-their-relationship/): Relationships are simple yet we complicate it when we don’t take the time to know and understand each other. Every relationship is unique and sustaining the relationship requires work from both parties involved. Here are twelve things every couple must do to sustain their relationship: Love, trust and respect each other. Loving your partner requires that you first love yourself so that you can give the love you have without expecting anything back in return. Understand that you need to love yourself to be happy with yourself neither will you trust and respect yourself or your partner. “If you don’t […]
- [How Much Do You Truly Value Yourself?](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/05/how-much-do-you-value-yourself/): How do you value yourself? How do others value you? The truth is: “The value you place on yourself will determine how others treat and value you.” – Kemi Sogunle Watch this video to learn 12 things you can do to begin to value yourself for who you are truly created to be. #lovesexliesandreality #beingsingle #beyondthepain #onbecomingrestored #kemisogunle #selfmastery #selfhealing Schedule a complimentary session with me to learn how find yourself, heal and move “Beyond the Pain.” This material is copyrighted. Copyright ©2014 Kemi Sogunle. All Rights Reserved. Get My Books
- [Why Forgiveness and Trust Are Vital in a Healthy Relationship](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/04/forgiveness-and-trust/): We all want to be in a healthy relationship but reality is that without understanding what love truly is, keeping a relationship (talk less of a healthy one), will be a challenge. A healthy relationship requires trust, love, forgiveness and communication to mention a few. However, all are dependent on the ability to heal from buried emotional wounds that interfere with and disrupt the relationship. “Pain and love cannot co-exist. You can never love anyone from a place of pain/trauma including yourself.” – Excerpt, “Beyond the Pain.” Copyright © 2014, Kemi Sogunle. All Rights Reserved. The ability to love requires […]
- [How to Heal Yourself - Emotional Wounds](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/03/how-to-heal-yourself-emotional-wounds/): Have you ever wondered why you suffer so much emotionally especially when it comes to romantic relationships? We acquire emotional wounds and trauma as children and this sips into our adult lives without being consciously aware of it. We perform, project, people please or self-abandon and we begin to lose ourselves in the process. Today, I’m sharing a few tips on how you can begin to heal yourself and break free from emotional wounds that you have carried for so long. Schedule a complimentary session with me to learn how find yourself, heal and move “Beyond the Pain.” This material […]
- [How to Heal and Forgive Yourself](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/03/how-to-heal-and-forgive-yourself/): Healing and Forgiving Yourself of Buried Emotional Wounds will liberate you from the pain/trauma you are holding on to and that result in the roadblocks in face in life’s journey. Understand this: “No one has the power to hurt you except you choose to accept it.” – Kemi Sogunle, excerpt from my book, “Beyond the Pain.” Copyright © 2014. All Rights Reserved Schedule a complimentary session with me to learn how find yourself, heal and move “Beyond the Pain.” This material is copyrighted. Copyright ©2014 Kemi Sogunle. All Rights Reserved. Get My Books
- [7 Must-Haves in a Healthy Relationship](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/03/7-must-haves-in-a-healthy-relationship/): We all desire to have healthy relationships that would not put a toll on us but this requires work on our part. Consider baking a cake, if the ingredients are not complete to make the cake, it will not come out right. The same concept can be used to evaluate what makes up the healthy relationship. Love This is the first ingredient in a healthy relationship. Without loving yourself first, you cannot truly love your partner. You cannot replace love or cover it with sex, infatuation or lust.  Understand your partner, spend quality time and let your love for each […]
- [3 Lessons to Take Away from Harry and Meghan's Interview with Oprah](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/03/harry-meghan-oprah-interview/): Watching Harry and Meghan sit with Oprah to air the truth about what they are facing, is a constant reminder for all of us on how we allow our family members to run our marriages without being consciously aware of it. Here are 3 vital lessons to take away from Harry and Meghan’s Interview with Oprah: They showed that their love for each other is most important and stronger than anything else. “When love speaks, it is about ‘us’ or ‘we’…when ego speaks, it is about ‘I’ or ‘me’.” – excerpt, “Love, Sex, Lies and Reality.” Copyright ©2014 Kemi Sogunle. […]
- [Breaking Generational Patterns of Trauma Dumping](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/02/breaking-generational-patterns-of-trauma-dumping/): Growing up in an environment where there is unresolved emotional trauma, results in us acquiring the pain/trauma as we mirror our caregivers/parents. Trauma dumping happens when unresolved trauma is unsconsciously dumped through anger, venting and punishment and the receiver becomes overwhelmed and drained. Trauma dumping may also result in trauma bonding especially when there is codependency involved. We go on to repeat the same patterns in our relationship without the conscious awareness. This is why you may find yourself meeting someone and sharing the traumatic experiences of your past. Suddenly, you feel you have both a lot in common without […]
- [5 Questions to Ask Yourself After a Breakup](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/01/5-questions-to-ask-yourself-after-a-breakup/): Breakups can be heart-wrenching but you must understand that they bring opportunities to discover who you are. Staying down after a breakup may result in you missing out on the lessons you are meant to learn through the process. Read this: The Difference between Falling in Love and Loving Someone. Here are 5 questions you must ask yourself after a breakup: What did you learn about yourself in the relationship? What must you do to learn from that experience? Did the relationship result in you gaining an awareness that will get you out of your comfort zone? Are you willing […]
- [How to Improve Your Self-Esteem](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/01/how-to-improve-your-self-esteem/): Your self-esteem is a reflection of how you feel about who you are. Your self-esteem can be damaged as a child if you happen to grow up in an unhealthy environment/family dynamic. You can improve your self-esteem and change your perception about yourself at any point in your life’s journey. Having a low self-esteem can affect your career, decision-making and relationships. Here are 8 things you can do to improve your self-esteem: Evaluate your negative beliefs. Understand that your negative beliefs are not a reflection of your true self. Eliminate each one as you evaluate and replace it with a […]
- [How to Live Your B.E.S.T Life in 2021](https://kemisogunle.com/2021/01/how-to-live-your-best-life-in-2021/): 2021 is a year of elevation and what that means is that you have to step up your game if you want to go far in life’s journey. Here are some steps to take if you want to live your best life going forward: Be Intentional about Your Life. Become Committed to Yourself. Be Flexible and Open to Learn and Receive. Be Coachable and Teachable. No one knows everything and you have to become humble to receive through those who can deposit nuggets of wisdom into your life.Be Prayerful. Pray without ceasing and build your relationship with God by taking […]
- [How to Know it is Time to Move On](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/12/how-to-know-it-is-time-to-move-on/): We sometimes hold on to relationships that no longer serve us. Knowing when to move on and step into something bigger, that God has planned for you is key to your progress. “A breakup is the beginning of new things and not an end to life.” – Kemi Sogunle If you to start to feel that there is more within You may be in a relationship and feel like there is something more that you need to achieve. You feel locked down. Deep down within, you know there is something bigger waiting for you. Your spirit gets restless within you […]
- [Signs You Are Ready for a Committed Relationship](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/12/signs-you-are-ready-for-a-committed-relationship/): Are you looking for a committed relationship or are you settling for convenience? Not knowing if you are ready for committed can result in unconscious settling for an entanglement or sexationship. In this video, I share what to look for and how to prepare yourself for a committed relationship. Not sure if you are ready for commitment or don’t know how to become ready? Accept my invitation to be part of the Purposeful Relationship Inner Circle (an exclusive monthly membership community for singles). You can also  schedule a complimentary session with me to learn how we can work together. Get […]
- [How to Set Yourself Up for a Healthy Relationship in 2021](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/12/how-to-set-yourself-up-for-a-healthy-relationship-in-2021/): Have you ever wondered why you haven’t found the one? Are you constantly meeting the wrong type of partners while trying to date? Are you tired of repeating this cycle over and over again? Find the partner who complements you requires work and sacrifice but you need the right mindset to set yourself up for a healthy and successful relationship. In this video, I share tips that will help you begin to set the pace for a healthy relationship, beginning with yourself. We are who we attract and accept and if you find yourself attracting anyone less than what you […]
- [What is Your Love Language?](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/12/what-is-your-love-language/): Love languages are based on unhealed childhood emotional pain/trauma. Without recognizing this, you will seek for love in the wrong places and create transactional relationships. If your love language is words of affirmation, you are looking for a partner who will speak the words you never received as a child to you. The moment your partner no longer affirms you, your childhood pain/trauma resurfaces and you begin to feel unloved once again. Acts of Service If your love language is acts of service, you played the role of the caregiver at a younger age which often leads you to people […]
- [My Journey to "On Becoming Restored"](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/12/my-journey-to-on-becoming-restored/): I’ve decided to share my part of my journey so far, with you. The bottom picture was taken 10 years ago when I decided to commit to my healing journey. I was tired of hiding and running from myself. My buried emotional wounds/trauma followed me everywhere I went. I acquired more pain in the process of running from myself. I knew it was time to shed the weight and the pain. My body kept scores. I could feel the pins and needles walk through my flesh from my trauma coupled with sleepless nights and anxiety. I felt caged. I was […]
- [Why Dating Red Flags Are Often Ignored or Unrecognized](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/11/dating-red-flags/): Dating red flags are sometimes hard to recognize or easily ignored depending on where you are with yourself emotionally. Having unhealed emotional wounds make it harder to recognize dating red flags especially when you are feeling abandoned, rejected unloved or lonely. Imagine you just met a partner who told you things you had longed to hear as a child. This person has just validated everything that was invalidated in you. You begin to quickly trust them without understanding that trust is built over time and is not something you can rush. You barely know him/her but the fact that those […]
- [Why Your Emotional and Mental Health Matter as a Man](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/09/why-your-emotional-and-mental-health-matter-as-a-man/): We live in a society that makes men believe that they don’t need to be #emotional. They end up living as their #ego and #shadow than becoming the light they are created to be. Men focus on careers and finances but #struggle emotionally and mentally while losing themselves. 🎯 It is time to reconnect with your true self as a man. It is okay to connect with your feeling and emotions. 🎯 It is okay to cry and heal. 🎯 It is okay to be yourself, find yourself and live than survive while burning yourself in the pain/trauma. 🎯 It […]
- [How Seeking for Acceptance and Validation Can Impact Your Growth](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/09/acceptance-validation/): Have you ever had to seek for acceptance and validation from others? Were you really validated based on the opinions of others or was the validation temporary? We sometimes seek for #attention and #validation to make us feel good about ourselves without realizing that our feelings are valid. We may have experienced childhood pain/trauma that we are unconsciously aware of or may have intentionally buried and avoid addressing. The pain/trauma often leaves us with a void that makes us seek for everything outside of ourselves in order to “feel” good but not be good to ourselves. Understand that when you […]
- [Becoming Your Authentic Self](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/08/becoming-your-authentic-self/): How often do you reflect on the phrase: “Come as you are?” How many times have you truly showed up as your #trueself? We have been conditioned and made to believe that we must pretend to be who we are not…faking it until you make it. Reality is that when you develop this false mindset, you begin to lose your #authenticity and start living in your shadow. You discover yourself struggling to fit in and forget that you were born to stand out. You discard your #values and #ethical lifestyle while compromising who you are. The #truth is that no […]
- [Join the Purposeful Relationship Circle](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/08/purposefulrelationshipcircle/): We sometimes find ourselves giving our all, in relationships. No matter what you do, it just never seems enough. Your partner decides it is OVER and you find yourself begging, chasing and pleading to make things work. You feel depleted, hopeless and confused about the whole situation. Your heart suddenly SINKS! You tried dating again and it is just the same old story…same type of partners and you feel like you are the BULL’S EYE taking all the hits of pain/trauma. YOU ARE NOT ALONE!! I was in the same boat before and as a certified life coach and relationship […]
- [Codependency and Intimacy](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/07/codependency/): Oftentimes, love and intimacy are misconstrued based on buried trauma/pain while being codependent in a relationship. Without fully understanding that intimacy during codependency is based on attachment and inner child wounds, you may not fully comprehend how and why you are acquiring more pain. It is also an avenue for tying your soul to a partner in an unhealthy relationship. This results in repeated patterns when trying to find a partner (without knowing who you are). You end up creating trauma bonds that leave your soul in a chaotic state. “The more you tie your soul to someone in an […]
- [Breaking Codependency and Emotional Attachment](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/07/breaking-codependency-and-emotional-attachment/): We become codependent at an early age and we begin to acquire emotional pain/trauma that reshapes our minds and life. This result in us developing limited beliefs that result in internal conflicts and longing based on the void we carry within…the inner child has being wounded. Seeking validation, having physical and emotional longing, lingering memories that are often re-enacted unconsciously or subconsciously as well as limited perception based on limited beliefs, result in you becoming more codependent and emotionally attached. These sometimes result in addiction, possessiveness and obsession with things and others. Read this: How to Practice Self-Love and Stop […]
- [Transactional Relationship - What You Need to Know](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/07/transactional-relationship-what-you-need-to-know/): Oftentimes, we get into relationships based on transactional mindset and we find ourselves acquiring pain but not finding the love we thought we would. Watch this to learn about transactional relationship and how it can derail you and make you lose yourself. Love will never deplete you but elevate you. Transactional relationship may result in you losing your confidence and voice. “You can never love anyone from a place of pain including yourself.” – Kemi Sogunle, Excerpt, “Beyond the Pain.” Copyright ©2014. All Rights Reserved. Ready to find yourself, regain your power and voice and attract the love you truly […]
- [Recognizing Your Own Power and Voice](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/07/recognizing-your-own-power-and-voice/): How often do you recognize your own power and voice? It is very easy to give away your power and voice without knowing you are doing so. However, you must understand that your voice and power were given to you for a purpose. It is easy to lose your power and voice when you are codependent on someone in a relationship or others in life. Giving your power away results in you losing yourself and voice. To regain your power, you must become committed to the journey of finding yourself, regaining your confidence and going through the healing process. Without […]
- [How to Practice Self-Love and Stop Self-Sabotaging](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/05/self-love-and-stop-self-sabotaging/): Q&A: How do I practice self-love and stop self-sabotaging in relationships? Loving oneself entails finding oneself. Before you can love anyone, you have to learn to know, understand and love yourself deeply. Read this: 10 Ways to Begin to Love Yourself. Self-sabotaging is based on several factors associated with not loving yourself. Read this: 4 Signs You Are Self-Sabotaging. Once you have learned to master loving yourself, it becomes easy to love someone else. Loving yourself also helps you regain your self-confidence. Read this: 5 Ways to Regain Your Self-Confidence/Esteem. It is also essential to know the difference between falling […]
- [10 Ways to Begin to Learn to Love Yourself](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/05/10-ways-to-begin-to-learn-to-love-yourself/): Loving yourself begins with a journey to self-discovery; learning about what makes you unique. It is the power to connect with your true essence; getting to know and understand who you are. Defining your core values and identifying your life goals and purpose. It’s is about mastering your life and journey. Read this: Are You Reaching Your Full Potential? “If you don’t love yourself, you won’t be happy with yourself. If you can’t love yourself, you can’t love anyone else. You can’t give the love you do not have. You can’t make anyone love you without loving yourself first.” – […]
- [2 Reasons Why People Cheat in Relationships](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/05/2-reasons-why-people-cheat-in-relationships/): Why do people cheat in a relationship? Have you ever been in a relationship with someone who cheated on you? Do you believe a cheater will always cheat? Cheating is an art that has been mastered overtime. Let’s talk about this! Watch This: 5 Reasons Why We Repeat Patterns Connect with me to schedule a complimentary coaching session to help you get started. Contact me here. Get My Books            
- [2 Main Reasons Why You Are Not Shifting to the Next Phase of Your Life’s Journey](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/05/2-main-reasons-why-you-are-not-shifting-to-the-next-phase-of-your-lifes-journey/): Have you found yourself stuck in life and do not know what to do? You have the desire to attain a higher level of self but find yourself locked in a zone that prevents you from moving forward. There is a way to get out of that zone. I share how to get out of that zone in this video. Learn about the Power of Your Thoughts Ready to learn how to attain your highest level of self? Connect with me to schedule a complimentary coaching session to help you get started. Contact me here. Get My Books     […]
- [Are You Reaching Your Full Potential?](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/04/are-you-reaching-your-full-potential/): Have you ever wondered why you cannot seem to attain self-fulfillment in your life and journey? Do you often beat yourself up because you find yourself constantly struggling to meet your life and relationship goals? Do you take the time to evaluate your life and relationship goals to see why you keep getting stuck in life? I have observed so many of us struggle over the years as a coach and noticed that the focus is usually around meeting basic and psychological needs. However, those only keep you within the comfort zone. The moment you begin to feel deficient in […]
- [How Well Are You Connected?](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/04/how-well-are-you-connected/): Often times, we do not realize how disconnected we are from our own lives. We have been conditioned to daily routines that we perform consciously or unconsciously (and sometimes subconsciously). We are always on the go and may not have time to introspect or self-reflect. In such as times as this (the Covid19 lock-down), we have the opportunity to deeply connect with ourselves to see where we have lost the tune: the sound of our own voices, the deep connection with our true self and the love we were born with. You may feel lost in the moment and do […]
- [The Power of Your Thoughts](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/04/the-power-of-your-thoughts/): Your thoughts can shape and make your life become better or bitter. Thoughts can create limited beliefs that lead to self-sabotage and awaken fear. “What you feed your mind, leads your life.” – Kemi Sogunle, Excerpt, “On Becoming Restored.” Copyright © 2014. All Rights Reserved. Get My Books            
- [How to Heal After Your Relationship Ends With a Narcissist](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/04/how-to-heal-after-dating-a-narcissist/): Healing after the end of a narcissistic relationship  can be challenging especially when you have a lot of unanswered questions in your head. Healing however, is a choice you will have to make if you are ready to commit to detoxifying your life and move forward. Having survived relationships with covert and malignant NPD sufferers, here are some steps that can help you through the healing process: Go NO CONTACT. Establishing NO CONTACT is vital to you setting the pace for your healing process. A part of you will want closure and want the narcissist to provide you with answers […]
- [Q&A: Why Did He Ghost on Me?](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/04/why-did-he-ghost-on-me/): Question: We have been together for a while and he suddenly ghosted. Did I do anything wrong? As a woman, you may think you did something wrong but without understanding what a man is looking for, you may believe you did something wrong. Read this: Six Things Men Look For in Women to get a better perspective. Enroll in the Purposeful Relationship Mastery Program for Singles to learn how to attract the right partner, stop self-sabotaging and codependency in order to build on a healthy relationship. Get My Books            
- [Domestic Violence and Coronavirus Lockdown](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/04/domestic-violence-and-coronavirus-lockdown/): Domestic violence is on the rise during the lockdown. With the abuser and the victim occupying the same space, your correspondence during this time is crucial as it can be detrimental or helpful. Knowing how to communicate with both the abuser and the victim can help reduce tension for both parties. I share a few tips in this video. Watch and learn about how you can help the abuser and victims of domestic violence. If you need support, do not hesitate to Contact Me. Get My Books          
- [How to Stay Emotionally and Mentally Healthy During the Coronavirus Lockdown](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/04/how-to-stay-emotionally-healthy-coronavirus/): The coronavirus lockdown can be challenging emotionally and mentally. It is however, a great time to examine where you are with yourself emotionally and mentally. Finding ways to stay healthy emotionally and mentally are vital to having a healthy state of mind during this period and beyond. “What you feed your mind, leads your life.” – Kemi Sogunle If you need support, do not hesitate to Contact Me. Get My Books          
- [7 Things You Can Do to Boost Your Mental Health During The Lockdown](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/04/boost-your-mental-health/): The coronavirus pandemic has resulted in social distancing and a lockdown. Having to self isolate is such a long period, can trigger anxiety, depression, loneliness or stress.   However there are several activities you can engage in, to combat this challenging times. If you are single, try online dating – In this age of technology, there are several dating apps available and this is also a great time to find a date/partner.You will have enough time to vet the potential partner since in-person dating is not a safe option at the moment. It usually takes 6-9 weeks to begin knowing someone […]
- [10 Things to Learn About a Narcissistic Relationship](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/03/10-things-to-learn-about-a-narcissistic-relationship/): Have you found yourself in a relationship where everything seemed to happen so fast? You discover that the partner you just met seem to be the perfect one…extremely charming, great sense of humor and you are getting all the attention from the start. You believe you are in love with him/her. He/she calls you often, sends text messages and may even ask you questions that make you uncomfortable at times. Everything seems to happen so fast. Being in a narcissistic relationship is unhealthy and toxic to you. You will lose yourself in the process of trying to win the narcissist […]
- [Healing the Inner Child](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/03/healing-the-inner-child-trauma/): Healing the inner child is one of the most difficult and challenging things you will have to face in life’s journey. You may have gone through a traumatic childhood experience that has left you with a lot of buried pain and numbness to yourself. The feeling of guilt or shame may overwhelm you so is the fear of rejection or feeling abandoned earlier on in life. Healing the inner child, sets the pace to you breaking free from what is breaking you silently. You will learn how to own your truth, find yourself and live healthy and purposefully. Copyright ©2014 […]
- [Insecurities, Conformity and Breaking Generational Cycles](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/03/insecurities-conformity-and-breaking-generational-cycles/): Insecurities, Conformity and Breaking Generational Cycles – Life & Relationship – Excerpts from my books, “Love, Sex, Lies and Reality,” “Being Single” and “Beyond the Pain.” At some point in life, you may become insecure, find yourself conforming with patterns that leave you in pain and repeating patterns and you begin to relive the live of generations before you. Insecurities are developed as we grow up based on the limited beliefs and the conditioning of our minds as children as well as fear lead us to conform to patterns and we never get to question to “Think before you act […]
- [5 Reasons Why We Repeat Patterns](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/03/5-reasons-why-we-repeat-patterns/): Have you found yourself repeating patterns or wondering why you keep attracting the same type of partners? Here are five reasons you should take note of to prevent yourself from continuing to repeat patterns: 1. Lack of healing Not healing after a broken relationship or divorce will lead to you repeating patterns and cycles. 2. Not learning the lessons The end of every relationship teaches you a lot of lessons that will prevent you from repeating patterns. “Without learning the lessons, you will keep repeating the same patterns and cycles.” – Kemi Sogunle 3. Seeking advice from people who have […]
- [Understanding Trauma Bonding](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/02/understanding-trauma-bonding/): Have you ever been in a relationship where you find it hard to let go? You believe this partner is your all in all. Him/her must have swept you off your feet initially making you believe that you have found the one. The love bombing phase could not have come at a better time than it did. Soon after the honeymoon phase, you discover that your partner begins to verbally, emotionally, mentally or sexually abuse you. You come of with apologies and try to make everything right. No matter what you do, you can never do right by this partner. […]
- [Why You Should Not Focus on Romance Alone](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/02/why-you-should-not-focus-on-romance-alone/): We all want to have a partner to spend the rest of our lives with. “Every man needs a woman and every woman needs a man to spend time with while growing together in love.” – Kemi Sogunle However, meeting the wrong partner may derail, deplete or devalue you. You are left with so much pain and may not know how to move forward. Here are some tips to help you stay on track while dating. Always remember: “Dating is a vetting and sorting game that will help you find the potential partner who complements you and matches up with […]
- [Why Labeling Others Reveals More About You](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/02/why-labeling-others-reveals-more-about-you/): We live in a society where labels are used loosely to describe people without necessarily understanding their behavior. Some of their behavior may be associated with the painful experience/trauma that they are dealing with or going through. Labels are a sign of judgement based on where you are operating from at the present moment or issues you may have buried and have not addressed. If we all take a pause and examine our lives, we will discover the hidden and unhealed parts of us that cause us to label others. Here are some ways labeling others reveals more about you: […]
- [Why Healing Seems to be a Challenge](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/01/why-healing-seems-to-be-a-challenge/): “Healing from painful (past) experiences or trauma can be challenge especially when your mind becomes convoluted (filled with anger and confusion) and you cannot seem to process your thoughts. Healing however, is a choice and it is essential to your growth. Taking steps to heal yourself deeply, sets you free and allows you to live a healthier life while building on healthy relationships (including that with yourself) that will make your life become better…emotionally, mentally and spiritually.” – Kemi Sogunle Learn more about coaching with me or email: coaching@kemisogunle.com. Get My Books          
- [Breaking Repeated Patterns](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/01/breaking-repeated-patterns/): We all grow to life and have been conditioned from childhood with limited beliefs, patterns we have mirrored in our lives from our caregivers (parents, family members or friends). This may have opened you to accepting pain/trauma as normal. We become broken and struggle internally to find a way out or run away from the pain/trauma. Brokenness becomes a way of life that we accept and no matter how we try to hide behind the mask of brokenness, we keep getting hurt than gaining the conscious awareness that we need to heal from the pain/trauma. This eventually leads to continuous […]
- [Abusive Relationship and Trauma Bond](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/01/abusive-relationship-and-trauma-bond/): Life is hard on its own not to think of experiencing an abusive relationship. The fear of not knowing where to go, what to do, who to trust…the guilt and shame, often leave partners hanging on to a string and staying in the abusive relationship. You learn to become part of the abuser’s life and begin to develop a trauma bond. You believe the pain and sufferings are normal and you are afraid to leave as you never know what could happen if you make an attempt to do so. Having children makes it difficult for you to want to […]
- [How Co-dependency Can Often Result in Self-sabotage](https://kemisogunle.com/2020/01/how-co-dependency-can-often-result-in-self-sabotage/): Co-dependency is something we all learn as a child. We learn to cling to our parents, friends and family members including those we are in a romantic relationship with. In the case of a romantic relationship, if the relationship ends, the co-dependent partner suffers more pain and feels betrayed. We become co-dependent and sometimes label ourselves as ‘selfless romantics’ when we have had our bout of feeling unloved, rejected or neglected as a child (and sometimes as an adult). Lack of self-love can lead to co-dependency Lack of love, experiencing rejection and feeling neglected as a child usually create a […]
- [Vision 2020 - Life and Relationship](https://kemisogunle.com/2019/12/vision-2020/): Vision 2020! Have you ever wondered why you keep going round in circles and repeating patterns? Do you struggle daily with getting out of a ‘sink’ whole? Do you have a vision for your life and relationship? You may find yourself dating the same type of partners over and wonder why you. Without having a vision for your life and relationship with set goals, you may find yourself not learning the lessons and turning them into blessings that allow you accomplish your goals. As we are about to begin a new year, take a rain check at where you are. […]
- [Why Relationships Do Not Last](https://kemisogunle.com/2019/10/why-relationships-do-not-last/): We have been so conditioned to believe that certain things do not make a relationship work. While some of these may be true, we need to take a look at those subconscious or unconscious things we do. Those little things that may drive a partner away due to our insecurities and fear. Have you ever had to talk to your partner at the beginning of your relationship about commitment but when you do not see it forthcoming later on in the relationship, you begin to panic? Today, I am  sharing those little things that you may be ignoring that may […]
- [Signs You Are Attracted to a Narcissist](https://kemisogunle.com/2019/09/signs-you-are-attracted-to-a-narcissist/): Have you ever wondered why you are attracted to a narcissist and wondered if you could find out earlier in the relationship if you are dealing with a narcissist? You may be dating a narcissist and wondering if something is wrong with you or if you are the cause of conflicts in your relationship. Here are some signs to watch out for: Strong attraction on your first date. You feel a very strong attraction because the narcissist is quite charming, has a great sense of humor and makes attempts to quickly win you over. You get asked a number of […]
- [Dating/Life After a Breakup or Divorce](https://kemisogunle.com/2019/07/dating-life-after-a-breakup-or-divorce/): Going through a breakup or divorce can be devastating. You have spent your time and life with your partner and never thought it will end so quickly. You are left all alone to figure things out and are wondering where to begin. You make an attempt to go on dates but you keep meeting crappy partners. It begins to dawn on you that you are attracting the wrong type of partners but do not know why. There are several factors that may also affect your decision making: Fear being the greatest culprit coupled with the pain/past experience(s) you have not […]
- [Why Most Relationships Fail](https://kemisogunle.com/2019/07/why-most-relationships-fail/): Every relationship starts with the first C – Chemistry which focuses on emotional, physical and sexual attraction. However, this may not last if the relationship is based on infatuation and lust only. You will discover that your emotions are hyped and you are losing control of yourself. The relationship is based on surface value than in-depth knowledge of who you are and who your partner is. You miss out of focusing on the core values that make you both compatible and complement each other. Every relationship needs the 3Cs: Chemistry, Compatibility and Complement. I have documented these in my book, […]
- [5 Dating Tips for the Divorced](https://kemisogunle.com/2019/06/5-dating-tips-for-the-divorced/): Dating after divorce can sometimes be challenging. You have been married and out of the dating league for a while and now you have to learn how to start the conversation while trying to figure out how to blend in without feeling rustic. Here are five tips to help you get back into the dating world: Always be yourself. You may want to impress your date but without being yourself, you may end up messing things up. Take a cue from your date and be a good listener. Do not be too quick to talk about yourself but learn to […]
- [Dear Single Woman - Finding a Partner Who is Worth A Lifetime](https://kemisogunle.com/2019/04/dear-single-woman-finding-a-partner-who-is-worth-a-lifetime/): As a single woman, you may have the desire to find the partner you wish to spend your lifetime with but without understanding a few things, you may be attracting brokenness to yourself. In this video, I talk about ways to discover what is leading to you attracting the wrong partner and becoming broken. “Two unhealthy people, cannot have a healthy relationship.” – Kemi Sogunle Relationships that are healthy, can significantly change the course of your life for the better not the bitter. Learn about Relationship Coaching with me. Get My Books          
- [Understanding Why Pain is Attractive](https://kemisogunle.com/2019/03/understanding-why-pain-is-attractive/): We go through life and may have a void left in our lives. Without taking the time to self examine and understand life’s journey and processes, you may end up attracting more pain into your life. “Pain and love cannot coexist…you can never love anyone in pain….not even yourself.” – Kemi Sogunle, Excerpt, “Beyond the Pain.” Copyright ©2014 Kemi Sogunle. All Rights Reserved. “Pain will only have the power to hurt you when you decide to hold on to it than let go of it.” – Kemi Sogunle Get My Books          
- [3 Reasons Why You Should Never Have Expectations in a Relationship](https://kemisogunle.com/2019/03/3-reasons-you-should-never-have-expectations-in-a-relationship/): Everyone has expectations (either set or gradually developed). However, expectations lead to disappointments and can leave you brokenhearted. Here are 3 reasons why you should not set expectations when going into a relationship or while in one: 1. Your partner will never be perfect – If you have expectations that your partner will be perfect and get everything right, you will set yourself up for a failed relationship. Always remember, no one is perfect and will ever be. Accept your partner as is (not based on facial or physical values). Gradually build on each other’s development and growth and let […]
- [Dating Tips for Single Women](https://kemisogunle.com/2019/01/dating-tips-for-single-women/): As a single woman (whether you have never married or you are divorced), you may have the desire to be in a healthy relationship but you have not met the right partner. You may wonder why you keep meeting the wrong type of partner and may be ready to give up on dating. Your approach to dating may be an issue. As a dating coach, here are some tips that may help you when going on your first date. Watch this video to learn more: Read: Falling in Love vs. Loving Someone Ready to find the love you deserve? Join […]
- [3 Things You Should Never Do After a Breakup/Divorce or Bad Experience](https://kemisogunle.com/2019/01/3-things-you-should-never-do-after-a-breakup-divorce-or-bad-experience/): We all go through life and relationship challenges but focusing on the bad experience or breakup/divorce does not resolve the problems. Asking yourself the question, “What happens next?” is essential to you going forward and growing in your life and journey. Here are three things you should NEVER do after a bad life experience or breakup/divorce: Focus on the problem(s): Magnifying the problem does not resolve the issues at hand but creates more problems. Rather than dwelling on the problems, focus on how to overcome and learn from the experiences.“The minute you make the negative choice to enlarge the problem, […]
- [3 Ways to Become Present in Your Life This Year](https://kemisogunle.com/2019/01/3-ways-to-become-present-in-your-life-this-year/): Have you ever wondered if you are present or absent in your life? I know you may be wondering why I am asking this question. Most of us live in the subconscious or unconscious state and have become numb to ourselves, due to certain life experiences that we do not want to remember or deal with. However, ignoring these issues often leave you in a semi-comatose state and you may find yourself asking these questions: What is happening to me? Why do I have to be the one going through this? Reality is:  Without answering to those questions, you may […]
- [How to Develop a Healthy and Successful Relationship in the New Year](https://kemisogunle.com/2018/12/how-to-develop-a-healthy-and-successful-relationship-in-the-new-year/): You may have experienced a heartbreak or divorce this year and with the year coming to an end, it is time to re-evaluate your life and relationship. It is important to know how to develop a healthy and successful relationship that will make your life better not bitter. Here are five things to focus on if you plan on developing a healthy and successful relationship in the New Year: 1. Hold on to the lessons from this year What did you learn about yourself, about others and about the kind of partner you need? Those lessons learned will serve as […]

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- [Book Kemi](https://kemisogunle.com/speaker-request/): Award-Winning International Speaker As an internationally sought-after speaker, I engage and connect with the audience while leaving them with thought-provoking messages while challenging them to take action and steps toward purposeful and truthful living. I am available for events ranging from: private parties/retreats, fundraisers, church gathering/conventions/conferences and high school and college events. Speaking topics include (but are not limited to): Overcoming Heartbreak: Strategies for healing and moving forward after a breakup or divorce. Self-Discovery: Encouraging individuals to explore and understand their true selves. Building Healthy Relationships: Tips for fostering positive and lasting relationships. Resilience: Developing the ability to bounce back from adversity and stay positive. Overcoming Insecurities: Techniques for building self-esteem and confidence. Navigating Life’s Challenges: Practical advice for dealing with various life obstacles. Finding Purpose: Helping individuals discover their life’s purpose and live more fulfilling lives. To book me for TV, radio interviews, speaking engagements & other media opportunities, send an email to booking@kemisogunle[dot]com or call (443) 741-1249. Download Speaker and Media Kit Speaker Sheet Media Kit Event Gallery […]
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- [Life and Relationship Coaching](https://kemisogunle.com/life-and-relationship-coaching/): 1:1 Coaching Services NOTE: Coaching programs are uniquely tailored to each individual’s needs in order to ensure your goals are being met. 30 Minutes Brainstorming Session ($97) Session is via phone or WhatsApp. Book Now 1-Hour Laser Coaching ($197) Session is via phone/WhatsApp. Book Now 4 Weeks Coaching Package ($497) 4 (four) – 60 minutes – Coaching Sessions Sessions are via phone/WhatsApp Book Now 6 Weeks Coaching Package ($697) 6 (Six) – 60 minutes – Coaching Sessions Sessions are via phone/WhatsApp Book Now Laces and Jeans™ Couples Coaching Program ($697) 6 (Six) Intense – 60 minutes – Coaching Sessions Sessions […]
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- [About](https://kemisogunle.com/about-kemi-sogunle/): I embarked on the journey of finding my truest self, learning to love who I am and break free from the repeated cycles of unhealthy relationships. This journey began after my separation and divorce. I had a longing to connect with the missing pieces of my life’s puzzle. I was tired of the carrying the emotional wounds and trauma I held on to for so long as a child. The self-healing journey felt more painful than the buried wounds. However, I emerged like a diamond in the rough to becoming a multi-award winning author of: “Love, Sex, Lies and Reality“- […]
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## Products

- [30 Minutes Brainstorming Session](https://kemisogunle.com/shop/coaching/30-minutes-brainstorming-session/): 30 Minutes Brainstorming Session
- [Purposeful Relationship Circle Membership](https://kemisogunle.com/shop/coaching/purposeful-relationship-circle-membership/): Are You Ready To Embark on the Journey of Healing After a Breakup or Divorce? [embedyt] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f_BJ2CdNHl4[/embedyt] Don’t Know Where To Begin? The Purposeful Relationship Circle is an exclusive monthly membership designed to support you as you go through the healing process: to find yourself, experience love and emerge into your true self so that you can build on healthy relationships that will help you become better and stay on track with your life’s purpose. What are you waiting for?  YOU WILL GET TO ENJOY THE FOLLOWING WHEN YOU BECOME A MEMBER OF THE PURPOSEFUL RELATIONSHIP CIRCLE: Monthly live video […]
- [Laces and Jeans™ Couples  Coaching Program](https://kemisogunle.com/shop/coaching/laces-and-jeans-couples-coaching/): 6 Weeks of Intense Couples’ Coaching on Communication,  Conflict Resolution, Finances, Intimacy and Trust. What you will receive: One hour 1:1 coaching for 6 weeks 1 additional complimentary phone call 10% off other products and services Weekly assessments  
- [One Hour Laser Coaching](https://kemisogunle.com/shop/coaching/one-hour-laser-coaching/): One Hour Laser Coaching tailored to meet your needs. What you will receive: One hour of 1:1 coaching Strategies to help you get unstuck and achieve your goals. Assessments  
- [4 Weeks' Coaching Package](https://kemisogunle.com/shop/coaching/gold-package-4-weeks-coaching-program/): 4 Weeks of Coaching customized to meet your needs. What you will receive: One hour 1:1 coaching for 4 weeks 4 (four) – 60 minutes – Coaching Sessions Sessions are via phone/WhatsApp Exercises and worksheets are completed during the sessions and as take home assignments.  
- [Platinum Package - 6 Weeks Coaching Program](https://kemisogunle.com/shop/coaching/platinum-package-6-weeks-coaching-program/): 6 Weeks of Coaching customized to meet your needs. 
- [12 Weeks Purposeful Relationship Mastery Program](https://kemisogunle.com/shop/coaching/12-weeks-purposeful-relationship-mastery-program/):   Have you hit rock bottom while trying to find the love of your life? Do you keep finding yourself with the wrong type of partner? I know how that feels, I was once in that boat myself but I learned how to climb out and create my CLOUD for my relationship. You may feel: FRUSTRATED You feel you cannot find anyone sincere and ready for commitment. You find yourself doing more and your partner doing less. You know you genuinely deserve someone who will not take advantage of you. STAGNANT You feel as if you are going round in […]
- [The Ultimate Guide to Dating and Finding the Love of Your Life](https://kemisogunle.com/shop/books/guide/guide-to-dating-and-finding-the-love/): Finding a partner can be challenging in today's world. However, you do not have to face the struggles of dating and finding love. The Ultimate Guide to Dating and Finding Love is a guide to helping you find and connect with the love you truly deserve to have in your life.
- [On Becoming Restored](https://kemisogunle.com/shop/books/on-becoming-restored/): Now Available for Order  Everything you and I deserve, is waiting on the other side of fear: the love, the happiness and the life God deemed for you. We cannot allow a dead situation hold us back or allow a broken relationship or divorce, prevent us from living the life God planned for us.    I waited for so long and held myself back. I had so much fear in me but then I summed up the courage...to break free, flap my wings, find myself and live again. I am on the journey and season of "Becoming Restored."
- [Bounce Back - Reclaim Your Life](https://kemisogunle.com/shop/uncategorized/bounce-back-reclaim-your-life/):     This course is designed to help you "Bounce Back and Reclaim Your Life. You may have gone through rejection, breakup/divorce or loss and may lost your self-confidence and esteem in the process. This course serves as a guide to help you navigate your way back, realign your mindset and turn your life around positively.    This course is a 4-part audio series.    What You Will Learn:     	Lesson 1: How to overcome rejection   	Lesson 2: How to regain your self-confidence and esteem   	Lesson 3:     	How to recognize the power of your words and thoughts   	Use your words and thoughts while taking action to reclaim your life       	Bonus:     	Fear - Learn how to overcome fear      
- [Beyond the Pain](https://kemisogunle.com/shop/books/beyond-the-pain/): Our desire to avoid pain, results in a shift from our true essence. Without gaining in-depth knowledge and understanding of why we experience pain in life and relationships or how to overcome it, we will remain stuck and exist. We however, must live the life God designed for us. There is so much life "Beyond the Pain."
- [Being Single: A State for the Fragile Heart](https://kemisogunle.com/shop/books/being-single/): Being Single is a State For The Fragile Heart. This book is a Guide to understanding Self-Love, Finding Yourself and Living Purposefully.  Have you been through a divorce or heartbreak? Need to find clarity and how to move forward? Being Single: A State For The Fragile Heart is easy to read. Learn how to understand what it really means love yourself. Take steps towards discovering your purpose in life. Learn how to put an end to fear while keeping up your faith. Become empowered and focused towards making progress. Embark on this self-discovery journey that will lead to a transformed life
- [Love, Sex, Lies and Reality](https://kemisogunle.com/shop/books/love-sex-lies-and-reality/): The passion, the fear, the denial, the trial and the truth. All exist in relationships. It's all about finding a balance and facing reality!
- [Sexy Starts with Self-Love® Tees](https://kemisogunle.com/shop/clothing/sexy-starts-with-self-love-tees/): Join the Sexy Starts with Self-Love®movement. Get your 100% cotton t-shirt. Machine Washable.
- [Sexy Starts with Self-Love® Hat](https://kemisogunle.com/shop/clothing/sexy-starts-with-self-love-hat/): Sexy Starts with Self-Love® Movement is a movement started by Kemi Sogunle to promote self-love/development. Join the movement by ordering a hat.
- [ME Fragrance](https://kemisogunle.com/shop/fragrance/me-fragrance/): "ME smells good and beautiful. Love the black velvet tote. I really like the smell. It's soft and not overpowering." ~ Sharyn S., GA
- [Slush Fragrance](https://kemisogunle.com/shop/fragrance/slush-fragrance/): "I ordered both Slush and ME for friends and I. I keep coming back for more. You can't find signature fragrances that smell so good and not too strong." ~ Gloria, MD
- [The Book Bundle](https://kemisogunle.com/shop/books/the-book-bundle/): Get all three relationship books, "Love, Sex, Lies and Reality," "Being Single: A State for the Fragile Heart" and "Beyond the Pain: A Return to Love" for a bundle price.


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